The Writing Games - Episode 3

It's been a while since we posted one of these. We had Carolyn and Amy home from college for the holidays, and the resulting Story Game stories were very amusing.  We play the Story Game by giving all of the players a sheet of paper and (roughly) 90 seconds to write something.  Their work is passed to the person next to them and moved around the table until everyone has made their contribution to it. Playing with younger children adds an interesting element to the prose.

A Troll gets Parole

Prison life was tough for the Holiday Troll. Two Christmases ago he was busted by the "Man in the Suit" and sent to the "Big House" for doing such a lousy job on his wrapping assignments.

"Hey, I'm a troll," he had said, but Santa was unsympathetic. He remembered the day with bitterness-- Santa's flushed face and disheveled snowy hair and beard. His usually twinkling blue eyes bloodshot from one too many 'nogs.

The Troll remembered looking down at the crumpled paper and tattered ribbon in his claws, and how he had shrunk in embarrassment. The lecture had been long and severe, and even Mrs. Santa (who had always been good to the Holiday Troll) could not condone such a lousy job.  One thing had led to another, and before he knew it, the Holiday Troll heard the gloomy grind of a barred door closing behind him.

"Oh no!" a tornado of Jingle Bells, red and green gingham, and snow-white curls was approaching.  Mrs. Claus (who was also the prison Matron) was bringing the Holiday Troll's rations. Three brisk, powerful knocks and a brusque "Well, Troll-y boy, I hope you're being good today," she began without introduction. "Santa's had an emergency, and you're to be released immediately." Hands on her hips, she eyed him suspiciously, then slid the heavy door open with her green jeweled heel. "Dinner's in the dining room," she said, then whirled and left.

The Holiday Troll stood, dumbfounded. Had his unjust sentence really come to an end without warning? And what emergency had led to this turn of events?

He had no idea. The next few minutes would be seared into his mind like a kid's signature into a tree's bark. They would be the most important in his life. Little did he know that Mrs. Claus intended them to be his last.

"Hi!" Wally (or the Holiday Troll) said. "I want to end the story now." (Throwing a big tantrum.)

Our life in Review, January 2014

Dear Family and Friends;

It’s been a while since we sent out a family newsletter, we are sorry we’ve lost touch with some of you.  However, it has been nice to keep up with those of you who are on facebook, and through occasional phone calls and e-mails.

Our two biggest news items this year have been the arrival of baby Samantha this November (that’s number nine, if you’re counting), and the news that we will be moving to Tucson, AZ this coming summer.  We knew Steve would only have his current job for two years, so we have been waiting anxiously to find out where we would be going.  Of course we were hoping to get out of the heat, but we’ll take further west too!  We are super excited to live closer to family and make visits with them more likely.  And Steve is really looking forward to his new job, which will require him to speak a lot of Spanish and MAY include some travelling to Central or South America—if the Congress solves our budget woes.

A review of our time here in Louisiana: 

Our family moved to Louisiana August 2012, where Steve started a new job as the deputy in the Second Bomb Wing legal office on Barksdale AFB.  He spends his time supervising the captains in the office, taking over when the boss is out of town, thinking of ways to break bad news to the wing commander, and occasionally helping with discharge boards.  He also gets to do an “Article 32” hearing every few months, which has let him visit Mississippi, Arkansas, and Missouri.  Steve has learned a lot in this position.  He enjoys working in a base legal office again…most of the time.  It has been very challenging.  There have been a lot of long hours, three day weekends that were spent working, and most days he works at least 11 hours.  And it will be a while before Rebecca forgets the Memorial Day 18-hour-work-days-for-five-days marathon spent getting ready for a discharge board.  However, it is nice to live on base, with his work just a few blocks away, so the work load has been easier for the family to tolerate.  He has also contemplated starting a support group for other military officers who do not yet own smart phones or have flat screen TVs, but so far there has been little interest. Steve has not played much basketball and no golf this year, but has done some running.  He did his first half-marathon in September.

Last November (2012), we went on another Loertscher Grand Adventure, this time all the way to Washington state.  Our purpose was to visit Rebecca’s grandmother who had recently suffered a stroke and is living in central Washington.  Just so you know, it is a looooong way from Louisiana to Washington State.  We had a wonderful time.  Well as wonderful as it can be travelling with that many children for that long.  As usual, the hardest part of our trip was keeping up with our laundry, but it was worth it.  AND no one threw up.  After driving up to Washington, we came back down to spend Thanksgiving with Steve’s family on the ranch.  It was wonderful to see everyone, and especially nice for the kids to enjoy their cousins.  

We haven’t really done anything else exciting while we’ve been stationed here, and since we don’t hunt, fish, gamble, obsess about Duck Dynasty, or frequent the Banana Republic outlet store, there isn’t that much to do.  We’ve spent a lot of time together as a family, hanging out around our fire pit in the back yard, playing games, having spontaneous parties with the neighbors, going to Sam’s Club, or trying not to go to Orange Leaf.  Our closest temple is in Dallas, TX; so we have driven over there every few months.  It’s 180 miles away, which isn’t too bad, but it is kind of hard to do with the kids when you go over and back in one day.  

We have loved living on base here in Louisiana.  The historic homes here are nicer and larger than the home we had in San Antonio (which, frankly, was not quite functional for a family our size!).  We love our wood floors, large screen windows, tall ceilings, cool wood work, large yard, and two patios.  Our yard is screened in with an enormous lilac hedge, so in the spring we can open our large living room windows and the smell floats through the house.  It is a big change to live somewhere with lots of trees, green grass you can actually walk on, and water you can turn on more than once every other week for two hours –we’re definitely not missing the San Antonio water restrictions.  The kids love the sprinklers in the summer.  It does get pretty hot here, and it is also really humid, so it feels hotter than San Antonio.  However, we are blessed to have an enormous tree in the back yard that stretches it limbs over the entire back side of our house, trampoline, and back patio.  Needless to say, we spend our time out there in the summer.  Fortunately (?) for us, the local schools are pretty terrible, so not very many people want to live on base, and there are a lot of other homeschooling families with in a few blocks of our home.  We have made some wonderful friends, and will be sad to leave them in a few months.

We also really enjoy our ward.  It is small in numbers, but has many dedicated members, a large portion of them military families.  The ward seems to be growing in recent months, partly because of the extra missionaries we have assigned to us.  We have 13 missionaries in our ward, and most of them have investigators in Church every week.  Many new friends have been made, and it will be difficult to leave.  Steve has been serving as the 11-year-old scout leader, as well as the primary teacher for the same group of boys.  Rebecca has been serving in the Primary Presidency.  It is fun to serve in the same organization together.

Rebecca continues to homeschool the children—this is year 12, but who is counting--and joined a local homeschool co-op this year.  The children have enjoyed learning new things and make a few friends.  Rebecca has probably made more friends than her kids.  At the end of the semester, all the children had some great art work to show off, the younger boys had learned kick ball, and all the younger children had mastered other important public school skills like how to stand in a line.  Amy had an opportunity to learn some sign language, Carolyn studied Shakespeare, and both of the older girls performed in a play.   This coming semester we have most of the same courses, only Rebecca will pick up a drawing class for the 8-10-year-olds.  Rebecca has also been guiding a few teens through a high school writing course (including our own), teaching from home. She will most likely teach public speaking this coming semester to the same group of teens.  Rebecca taught the same class a few years back, which must have worked because David was asked to speak in stake conference this past summer.  Ha ha! How his parents chuckled!  Last spring she taught a cooking class in our home, which was a fun way for the younger children to meet some other homeschoolers.  Rebecca’s secret reason behind the class was to train Bryan and Lauren to make breakfast.  But although they learned how to cook breakfast food, unfortunately they did not learn to do it quickly, and their first on-the-job experiment resulted in a breakfast though while tasty, took two hours to get on the table.  Two hours.  

Over the past year, we have not really done too many exciting things, as we are sort of a boring family.  However, we did visit south Louisiana this past May for a few days, hoping to hit the beach.  Instead we found ourselves in a monsoon-like downpour for three days--good thing we were not in a tent as originally planned.  But we DID get to visit the Acadian pioneer farm, which was fascinating, and also the Tabasco Factory, where we learned more about Tabasco than we ever thought possible.  If you ever drive through south Louisiana, we highly recommend both.  Steve also took the kids out on an extended canoe ride…which included alligators. 

The “Story Game” has been a huge hit with our family this year, which is super fun because most of us can play together, and we get to see all the children’s personalities in their writing.  To play the “Story Game,” you need a timer, sheets of paper, and writing utensils.  Everyone starts a random story, writes for 90 seconds, then passes it to the next person.  When the story makes it all the way around the circle, everyone reads their stories aloud.  So it turns out that when you mix the writing abilities of teens (who use impressive vocabulary and very creative descriptions) with dads (who write with a lot of humor) with elementary-aged boys (who like to write about things blowing up, star wars, or tater-tot casserole) with everyone else, you can get some pretty interesting and amusing stories.  We often invite the neighbors over to play with us…and we’ve even found it’s a great ice breaker for teen parties.

Another fun thing that has made its way into our family culture this year is the Dressing Your Truth program.  To be succinct, it is a program that claims that there are four basic energy types, and that by discovering your energy type you can understand what colors, fabrics, patterns, and styles you should wear to reveal your “inner beauty.”  The program is also useful in helping you understand how other people (including your children!) operate and think.  Rebecca received the book for Christmas last year, read it in a day or two, then immediately sent one to her sister.  They discussed what “type” they were for several weeks before both purchasing the course.  What started as a casual interest has blossomed into a constant source of conversation for our entire family, including the little boys.  “What type am I?”  “Do I look good in this color?”  “Do type fours act like that?”  “What type is my ______ (fill in the blank…friend, sibling, primary teacher, neighbor, random person in Walmart).”  While Rebecca is still not 100% convinced this program is accurate for everyone all the time, it has been interesting and fun, has helped her understand herself and her children better, and made clothes shopping for herself and her three older daughters so much easier.  Yes, you read that correctly. 

And now on to a review of the children who inhabit the Loertscher household….

Our new baby Samantha arrived a little earlier than expected this fall.  Though Rebecca’s blood sugar numbers remained fairly normal throughout the pregnancy, she experienced polyhydramnios, a fancy word she could never remember, which means excess amniotic fluid.  Basically it meant lots of extra ultrasounds, doctor’s appointments, and an extremely uncomfortable expectant mother starting about September.  After Samantha was born and weighed in at 11 pounds 1 ounce (don’t worry—it was a planned c-section!), and Rebecca saw all of the amniotic fluid (3 liters +!), the uncomfortable pregnant mother mystery was solved.  Nurses on shift at the hospital came into the hospital room to see the “big baby.”  Evidently, 11 pound babies are not born every day.  

Nevertheless, our now two-month-old darling sweetie is doing well.  She is a content little thing who enjoys music—daddy has discovered she will quiet down for Enya--smiling at family members, and sleeping. Rebecca often finds Lego offerings (from two-year-old Thomas) and Barbies in full regalia (from four-year-old Elizabeth) near the baby’s head while she is napping.   Looks like they are in a hurry for her to grow up and play with them.  If she would just go to bed before midnight, she would be the perfect baby.

The aforementioned Thomas and Elizabeth are keeping the mother busy the last little while.  Currently, their latest trick is to start the Frozen (new Disney movie) sound track and then sing along.  It is awfully cute to hear the two little voices pipe in the hallway, “Let it go!  Let it go! Can’t hold it back anymore!”  When not working on their future careers as teen pop stars, the two preschoolers spend their time asking mother, “What can I do?”

Seven-year-old John has spawned a series of family sayings under the category, “Why seven-year-olds don’t date.”  One of the family favorites is the lion-eating-zebra-on-the-savannah-act, which John employs while eating his pancakes at breakfast time.  We hope he has developed some table manners by the time he is sixteen.  Or at least his dates will hope he has.  Meanwhile, we enjoy his optimistic spirit, loving nature toward his smaller siblings, and a homeschool mom always appreciates a child who will complete his work quickly and responsibly.  John is super smart, loves science, math, and reading; and is easy to teach.  Just don’t sit too close at the dinner table.

Our resident nine-year-old, Bryan, has taken his place as the family Eeyore.  Let’s listen in while Bryan employs his homeschool-honed social skills on a missionary visiting for dinner:

Random Elder:  (smiling)  “Hey dude, how was your day?”

Bryan:  (suddenly adopting a sad, mopey expression):  “Not very good.” 

Random Elder:  (trying to keep smiling at this unexpected response, not realizing it was a common occurrence)  “Oh no—what happened?”

Bryan:  (beginning to sniffle)  “Lauren was mean to me.  She told me to go away.”  (a tear forms in the corner of one eye at the remembrance). 

Lauren:  (listening from across the room)  “I didn’t tell you to go away.  I told you to get out of my room.”

Random Elder:  (shifting uncomfortably, casts a concerned glance at Bryan’s mom)

Bryan:  (suddenly angry, voice rising) “And John left me to pick up the whole bedroom by myself while he was getting his so-called clothes on this morning!  And he played with my Snap Circuits without permission!”

Mother:  (embarrassed) “Well, it looks like dinner is ready!”

Bryan is also a joy to teach in our homeschool, if you can overlook the whining about why something is not fair. He has a very exacting nature, and in his mother’s judgment, is the most likely candidate to follow in his father’s footprints as an attorney. When not busy with school work, Bryan enjoys listening to audio books, arranging his Snap Circuits, playing with Legos, and jumping on the trampoline with his siblings….as long as they are being fair.

Lauren has a broad range of interests as she approaches her twelfth birthday.  She is usually found (WHEN NOT BUSILY ENGAGED IN HER SCHOOL WORK--LAUREN ARE YOU READING THIS?!) in her bedroom, perfecting her drawing skills as she listens to audio books, or reading.  Lauren also enjoys riding her bike, jumping on the trampoline with her brothers, and scouting around in the neighborhood to see which her friends are out and about.  She has developed a real interest and aptitude for cooking lately which is fun to see. Lauren makes a pretty mean pot of hot chocolate from scratch. She is always sweet natured and is very kind to her younger siblings, including her little sister that she shares a bedroom with, so that is saying something. 

Amy recently turned 14, the magical-and-long-awaited age at which you can finally do fun things at church.  Her first stake dance this past weekend seems to have been a success, at least that is what we were led to believe.  She is still taking piano and started the guitar last year, which has been fun because now she can accompany us for our backyard fire pit parties.  Amy has a broad range of interests, including food and nutrition (we spent many fun weeks juicing this summer!), cooking (we like to experiment with ethnic foods and flavors), French (she has a wonderful tutor in the ward), composing music, of course drawing.  She is a very talented Manga artist, and with Carolyn, her roommate, spends many hours a week honing her talents.  Amy is fascinated by the alternative health methods her mother is continually dabbling in, and is considering a career in the field of health or nutrition.  And she has been a life saver in the kitchen since the baby came, since sometimes it takes mother two or more hours to put dinner on the table since the baby arrived if she does it alone. 

Carolyn turned 16 in November of this past year, and it is hard to believe she will be leaving us in just two or so years.  She has grown up so much recently and is becoming a truly wonderful young lady, despite the fact that she is the only sixteen-year-old she knows who does not own a cell phone.  Carolyn has become very passionate about her artwork over the past year, and spends many hours a day perfecting her skills.  Some hours that probably could be devoted to Algebra II or Chemistry….just the mom talking here.  She hopes to head off to college in the next couple of years—we have discovered the “when” is pretty flexible when you homeschool--with an eye on a major in the art field, or possibly art education, as she is a good teacher, especially when working with children.  Carolyn also enjoys drama (she was the wicked queen in Snow White this past summer), running (rockin’ the toe shoes), singing (she and Amy have sung in church multiple times over the past year), and taking naps (thank you, seminary!).

Right after Christmas we spent our time getting David ready for his departure for BYU-I in Rexburg, Idaho.  David has been attending the local community college since last summer, including a full load this fall.  Finally we figured he was ready to head out into the big broad world on his own…*sniff*…*sniff.*  He is sorely missed by everyone in the family, but we know this is an important part of him growing up.  He seems to be having a good time so far, and was even heard to say he “enjoys” his organic chemistry and calculus classes.  So far.  He is thinking about majoring in bio-chemistry, with an eye on research or possibly the medical field. 

We had a very nice Christmas season this year.  The highlight may have been having all 13 missionaries over for Christmas Eve, which was a lot of fun for us, but a big hassle for the Security Forces troops at the Visitor’s Center.  But it was amazing to have so many wonderful young people in our home at once.  It also made us think a little bit about how next year, David will be on a mission.  Hopefully the members will help him have a nice Christmas, wherever he ends up.  Somehow we transformed from a young couple with small children to a “mature” couple with teenagers…and still with small children.

Well, that is our overly-long review of the past year or so.  It was fun to write, the kids had fun reading it, and we enjoy sharing our lives and interests with our friends and family.  We loved hearing from everyone at Christmas time this year.  It was a joy to see how grown-up everyone was, and how well everyone is doing.  We feel truly blessed beyond measure to have so many wonderful friends.  Sorry this is so late, and have a wonderful new year!

The Loertscher 2013 ABC's 
Louisiana Edition

A
Acadians:  Yeah, we didn't know what they were either.  A little jaunt down to south Louisiana last spring cleared it up for us.

Amy:  She just turned 14! And she loves to draw. And cook. And go to seminary.  And play piano and guitar.  And speak French. 

Alligators: Canoeing in a lake full of scaly reptiles is bad enough. But for Bryan, finding a spider in his canoe was even worse.  His screams reverberated around the lake for at least a mile.


Avatar=Awesome: One of our favorite shows.


B
Bryan:  Nine-year-old Bryan most closely identifies with the Pooh character Eeyore.  He's a handsome lad who loves making electronic circuits, lego models, puns and arguing with everyone. He enjoys Cub Scouts (most of the time) and earning Wii turns.

Bayou: Basically a cross between a river and a really big puddle. There are lots of them here in Louisiana.

Beep:  The sound an alarm clock makes, much to the chagrin of the faithful seminary-goers.

Bamboo:  Upon finding a small forest of bamboo, we were pleased to discover these little guys on our trip to south Louisiana this spring.

Bun: (See Elizabeth) Not sure why we still call her this.

C
Co-op/CREDO:  Our home school group. We take sign language, art, science fun, crafts, Shakespeare, and drama. 

Carolyn: Carolyn has become very interested in art this past year, and had decided to either become an art teacher, or work for Disney so she can shake up the animated film industry with her "brilliant" ideas and epic skills. Earnestly she works hard to get caught up on all her school work that piles up while she is off drawing somewhere....she likes running, biking, cute boys, drawing, painting with water colors, and chocolate. Lots of chocolate.

  
Christmas Cookies:  The staple of our Christmas treat plates, but the cookies the kids decorate sometimes don't turn out as planned.
Most of our gingerbread men have morphed into aliens, cyclopes, and Patrick from Sponge Bob, which is strange because we've never seen Sponge Bob.

Chemistry:  David's favorite subject and Carolyn's least favorite.

Chopped:  Recently available on Amazon Prime, this is another of our family's favorite shows.  We love the thrill and excitement it brings on a boring evening. And two-year-old Thomas recently learned to say, "Whose dish is on the chopping block!"  Mom also uses it as a bribe for clothes-folding. Sneaky!

Crawfish:  A famous Cajun dish we haven't tried. Too scary.

D
David: Sort of graduated from high school unexpectedly by getting a good score on the ACT and taking classes full time at Bossier Parrish Community College, home of the noble "Cavaliers."  He is headed to BYU Idaho in January.

Driver's permit: What Carolyn has (finally) received.

Dressing Your Truth:  A program that teaches you what colors and styles you look best in based on your personality and energy.  We have had a good time with this--now even the boys in the family want to know what colors they look best in!!

Deviant Art:  An art website that allows artists from all over the globe to post, share, and receive feedback on their work. Carolyn and Amy are both currently members.

Dog sitting:  The lucrative responsibility of Amy and Carolyn, the two dogs (Roscoe and Cedar) are very well trained and obedient (thank goodness).

Date:  David went on another one.

Discharge Board:  Steve litigated a bunch of these this year to great success, earning some "street cred" with the Captains in the office.


E

Elizabeth: She's a new big sister. She's very cute and a lot of fun. 

Epic fail: Something cool-sounding that we say when somebody messes up. It doesn't really mean anything.

Ear tubes: What both Bun and Thomas have gotten this year.

Electricity: Yes! What Brian and John learn about playing with their Snap Circuits.

F
French:  What Amy, Bryan and Daddy have been studying. Vous-parlez francais? Notre famille parlez un peau, oui.

Fred: The universal family nickname.  What Daddy calls everyone.

Fashion: What Bun is crazy about.  She's very image-conscious, and refuses to wear pants--only skirt will do.  Mommy has finally learned to invest in some leggings.

Firework (see SONOS):  By Katy Perry. What Thomas loves to dance to.

Frostbite: What the teens who have lived in the South for too long think they get every morning for seminary. Oh, and the blessings, too.

Fireplace: We're so desperate for a real, working fireplace that we've resorted to this:  a crackling fire that someone has filmed for an hour and a half, found on Netflix. It's actually sounds pretty authentic, and that's what counts, anyway.

G

Gumbo:  The famed seafood soup of Louisiana that no one has tried yet. Sorry, if you're looking for recommendations, we can't help you! 

Gesundheit:  What we said a lot in December when we got colds and our noses were all stuvved ub.


H
Haunted house: This is what David carefully avoided this year after getting the bejeepers scared out of him last year. He now has a phobia for chain saws, which rules out lumberjack as a career choice.

Hobophobia: Amy is scared of "hobos," not that she's ever met one.  Going downtown makes her nervous.  And she hid in the shoe aisle when mother was approached by one for a handout a months ago in our local Walmart.

I
 Ice cream maker:  We got one for Christmas last year, and used it almost weekly since.  Delicious.

Integrated circuit: Ask Bryan, the local circuit expert. He is a real nerd.

Imagination: What this family has plenty of (or at least imagines that it does).


J
Jimmy: David's awesome friend who lives around the corner. Basically the big brother he never had.  Our younger children love Jimmy almost as much as Jimmy's parents do.





John: The seven-year-old wonder.  He's very excited about getting baptized next year. He's good at math, and loves to dance. An all-around good dude.

JAG:  An Air Force lawyer and what Steve still does to pay the bills around here.  Twelve years and going strong!


K

Kids: We have nine of them now.  We have started splitting them into three groups: The Bigs (David, Carolyn, Amy) the Littles (Elizabeth, Thomas, Samantha) and the Middles (Lauren, Bryan, and John).

Klutz: You can learn some sweet skills from these.  It is possible we own every Klutz book ever published.


L
Lauren: Getting very tall--she'll be 12 soon. She loves to draw and read. And she's a big help with the "littles."



M
Mai Ploy: Sweet chile sauce. Makes any Asian-ish dish taste better. The commissary always seems to be sold out of the stuff.

Manga:  Not sure how Carolyn and Amy got hooked, but it seems they're always reading or drawing Japanese-style comics.  Their dream is to get one published, which if they manage to do they will be set for life since they sell for about $10 a pop.

Mom: Everyone's favorite.

My Little Pony: It's amazing what you can get hooked on just because it's on Netflix.  If you haven't watched it, don't start, whatever you do.

N
Nothing: What there is to write about for this letter.

O
Orange Leaf:  Yummy frozen yogurt place.  I bet you have an "Ounce Back" card in your wallet.

Organ:  What David aspires to play some day.


P
Princess: What Elizabeth wants to be when she grows up.

Pizza: We get "Hot-n-Ready" ones when Rebecca is fed up with the kitchen, or in a hurry, or both.

Piano: David and Amy love to play this thing. And they got to play Vladimir Horowitz' grand piano in a store in Shreveport this year.


Q
Quiet: Not sure what this is. We've heard of it, but haven't heard much of it.

Quarantine:  What we imposed when three of the kids came down with Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease.

R
Red River: A big muddy river we drive over several times a week.

Rebecca:  Very busy this year with home school. Still recovering from new baby Samantha. Very smart. Very cute.

S
Samantha: The newest addition to our family. She's a wonderful baby, and even sleeps sometimes. Will she be the last?



Studio C: Hilarious comedy show on BYU TV.  You've seen it if you know what "Lobster Bisque" is.

Santa: Left the kids some good loot this year.  John is wondering why he uses the same wrapping paper Mom and Dad use.

Speech therapy:  Elizabeth gets this once a week. She's doing better!

SONOS:  This is the cool wireless speaker system we use to broadcast music all over the house.  One of our favorite things of all time.

Seminary:  The three "Bigs" go to this faithfully every weekday. They have been studying the Book of Mormon this year.

Steve:  Turned 41. Ran a half marathon. Got selected for promotion to Lieutenant Colonel.  Did not play golf all year. 


T
Tucson:  Looks like we're moving there next summer! We can't seem to get out of these hot climates, but we're so excited to be somewhere out West where they have mountains.

Tabasco:  We went to the factory where they make this stuff on Avery Island, Louisiana.  Yummy. Spicy. Red.

"Too Baah": Thomas's favorite saying. Roughly translated, it means "Too bad."

U
Ugly monsters: A random exclamation John loves to make. Randomly.

Unity: This is Samantha's middle name. Really.


V
Video games: Whenever you ask Bryan what he likes to do, he says, "Play video games." You'd think that was all he ever does, but in fact the mean parents only let the kids play when they earn a turn by doing school work or jobs around the house. Don't call CPS on us!

W
Why are we writing this?!

Watered down (see Mai Ploy): To accommodate the number of people and the popularity of certain condiments,  Mommy has to sneakily water it down.

X
X-mas: What we don't call the holiday on 25 December.

Y
Yo-yo:  An old school toy the boys find fascinating. Also what a stuttering narcissistic Spanish speaker might say.

Yams: Dad made some really yummy ones at thanksgiving. Here's the trick: boil the yams in water until they're almost soft. Then drain the water and boil them in maple syrup the rest of the way. Drain off the syrup and eat it on pancakes the day after Thanksgiving instead of going shopping. Eat the yams, but not with the pancakes. That would be gross.

Z
Zipper: Invented by Whitcomb L. Judson. We own lots of these.